it's my result to a challenge set by Chiili from the TRFFF. here's what she asked for:
Slash challenge!: The band on summer holidays somewhere far away (preferably a beach included )
It must include:
- Coke, coffee and cookies and such "summer" food
- Huge swimming trunks
- Sun lotion
- The karma sutra book
- Bed sheets (but they don't have to be in a bed... )
- A silly (maybe a little cheesy fluffy) moment with love music
And the lines:
"Stop looking at me like that!"
"Are you serious?"
"Oh no I got sand between my toes!"
And preferable Lauki pairing, but you choose!
More than friends?
A cloudless blue sky, turquoise water, white sand, palm trees, what can you wish more for? This is the perfect beach for the perfect holidays.
Alright, great beach, beautiful island, my best friends around, so far so good. Just that one little thing is keeping me distracted from enjoying all this the way I should. Lauri. Not that he is a little thing… well, somehow he is but what am I saying? I’m only like an inch taller…
Just look at him, the way his huge swimming trunks have filled with air and are now floating next to him like little buoys… and the way he’s trying to push them under water, trying to still look cool at the same time… adorable!
Oh my, if he heard my thoughts he would probably collapse in laughter. He’s Lauri, your band mate, your best friend, your drinking buddy, the one you make a perfect team with when it comes to picking up girls… pull yourself together, Aki!
Everyone knows that the only thing Lauri is interested in besides music is girls! Yeah, and everyone thinks the same about me… and it’s not like I don’t like girls, it’s just that Lauri… come on, forget about him, you like girls and Lauri is not a girl. Even if he wears make-up.
Focus Aki, girls, girls, girls. Maybe I should check out the beach for dating material… well, doesn’t even have to be dating material, fucking material would do just fine to distract myself for a while…
Considering this island is supposed to be a party island, the Mallorca of the Indian Ocean, the beach is quite empty. Guess everyone is sleeping in today. Except for my band mates there are only a dozen other people, mostly couples. Just one girl is sitting alone under a palm tree, writing into a small book. Oh please, don’t let her be a diary-writing bookworm or something equally hard to flirt with… She looks alright from far away, brown hair, ponytail, I should go over and talk to her… What the fuck?
Lauri is standing in front of me, shaking his body like a wet dog and spraying cold water at me. He grins and drops himself next to me.
“Only here for one day and already checking out the girls, huh? That’s the way we know and love you, Aki!”
He said he loves me… I love you, too! Wait, do I? I’m thinking about him a lot lately, ok, all the time but does that mean I…
“Damn, I hate these shorts,” Lauri mutters annoyed and fumbles on his swimming trunks.
“I told you there’s a difference between baggy and ridiculously oversized, dude,” I say.
He throws a bottle of sun lotion at me. “Why don’t you shut up and put some lotion on my back instead?”
Lauri turns around and waits expectantly for me to do what he wants. I stare at his back for a moment. Though he’s slim, he’s well-built. He stretches his neck and shoulders, his muscles move under his tanned skin. Wonder where he got that tan from, considering he spends most of his time inside, hiding from the sun. A sudden image of Lauri lying on a tanning bed with these little plastic glasses on his eyes pops up in my head and makes me giggle.
“What?” He asks.
“Nothing,” I mutter quickly and spread some sun lotion on his back. I let my hands wander over his skin, softly at the sides, massaging a bit harder at his shoulders. His skin is warm and smooth. I wonder how it feels on… other parts of his body…
“Pass me the bottle,” Lauri rips me out of my thoughts.
I’m glad he doesn’t see me, cause my face feels like it’s on fire. I need to stop thinking about Lauri this way. It’s just too weird! Not that I would be shocked if I was gay, well, probably a bit in the beginning but it’s a given fact that Lauri is into girls. If I go on like this, I will only hurt myself.
“Now I know why the girls are queuing to get backrubs from you, you’re really good at this,” Lauri says and puts some lotion on his legs.
He wiggles his toes. "Oh no, I got sand between my toes!"
“That’s what happens when you’re at a beach, you know?”
“Why don’t you shut up and keep your stupid comments to yourself? And if you don’t go over to talk to that girl any soon, I’ll do it myself,” he adds.
Luckily in that moment Eero and Pauli are coming out of the water and join us. Talking to that girl is the last thing I wanna do right now…
“Man, swimming always makes me hungry like hell,” Eero sighs while drying himself with a towel.
“Dude, you’re always hungry, not just after swimming,” Pauli tells him and starts unpacking his bag.
There’s coke and coffee, cookies, sandwiches, a pineapple and an enormous water melon.
Lauri cuts off a piece of melon and bits into the red flesh.
“Hmmm, good,” he mutters.
Juice is smeared all over his face. Even now he looks cute.
Damn, Aki, pull yourself together.
Pauli giggles. “Dude, that melon juice make you look like you’re wearing lip gloss!”
“Yeah, just that your lip gloss is all over your face,” Eero adds grinning.
Lauri rolls his eyes. “I’m a man, I don’t wear lip gloss.”
“But eyeliner and nail polish. That’s only a tiny step to lip gloss,” Pauli laughs.
“You know, your jokes are getting old,” Lauri replies tiredly, grabs a book that has fallen out of Eero’s bag and throws it at Pauli.
He misses him, I catch it and read the title.
“You’re reading the Karma Sutra, Eero?” I ask surprised.
“I bought this book second-hand at the market this morning, thought it would be a nice present for my wife.”
“Oh, yeah, a completely unselfish gift,” Lauri grins, takes the book and skips a few pages. “Uh, that one looks interesting. And that one. That’s a good one, done that. And this one. Oh, and that. This one… well… that’s,” Lauri turns the book upside down, then he smiles, “if it’s supposed to be this way it could be interesting but,” he turns the book back, “I’m afraid I’m not flexible enough.”
I look over his shoulder and at the drawing. I’d happily volunteer to find out if he’s flexible enough for that one…
“Man, you’re leaving juice stains all over it!” Eero complains and rips the book out of Lauri’s hands.
“You should be lucky if these are the only stains on this old book,” Lauri chuckles.
Eero just mutters “Gross!” and rolls his eyes.
That night I step out of the bathroom after having taken a shower and find Lauri kneeling on the bed. He’s only wearing boxer shorts and has started to throw the pillows and blankets on the floor.
I really wish he would wear some more clothes, it’s hard enough to not think about his gorgeous body when he’s fully dressed.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m getting dressed,” Lauri replies and pulls the sheets off the mattress.
Ok, he’s a little weird sometimes but this is somehow going to far. Wonder when I should start worrying about his mental condition… But then again, if he knew how I’m feeling about him he probably would start worrying about MY mental condition…
“Come on, don’t tell me you haven’t seen the posters all over the hotel. There’s a toga party tonight!”
I remember I’ve seen a flyer somewhere. “That’s tonight?”
“Yeah, come on, get dressed. And hurry up, I wanna get really drunk tonight!”
I feel a bit stupid when Lauri and I walk down the hall but hey, it’s not like we’re gonna be the only ones just wearing bed sheets, everyone else will look equally embarrassing.
I hear disco music through the closed doors.
Lauri pushes them open and shouts “Woohoo! Togaaaa!”
And never in my life before have I’ve been so happy about loud dance music cause fortunately no one has heard us. It’s humiliating enough that everyone close to the door stares at us.
We are the only one who are not wearing regular clothes. No, wait, two girls in a back corner are wearing togas, too.
“Oops, guess the toga party is not tonight,” Lauri smiles ashamed.
“Oh, really?” I snort sarcastically. “Come on, let’s go back and change.”
I look at Lauri. “Are you serious? Come on, let’s go!”
“All I wanna do is get drunk tonight and pants are not important for this plan,” he explains and walks towards the bar.
I feel the other people’s eyes on my back when we walk by but whatever, I’m used to getting stared at anyway.
Lauri orders a beer and a vodka. He down his shot and looks around. Then he grins.
“Changed my plans. I wanna get drunk AND get laid!” He gets up and walks towards the two toga girls in the corner. “What are you waiting for? There’s two of them, one for me and one for you!”
I follow him slowly. Maybe I really should try to hook up with a girl tonight, maybe that gets me back to my senses and makes me stop thinking about Lauri all the time. Maybe that’s what it needs to set me straight. Literally…
Lauri is already talking to the blond girl. I turn towards the other girl. It’s the one I’ve seen at the beach earlier today.
“Hi!” I give her my best smile.
She looks at me for a short moment. I know that look. Girls always look like this when they recognize me. For a second you can always read their thoughts in their faces, wondering whether they should admit that they know me or pretend like they don’t.
“I’m Aki, what’s your name?”
“That’s an unusual name,” I state.
She raises her left eyebrow and snorts sarcastically. “Oh, really? And Aki isn’t?”
I shrug my shoulders. “In my home country it’s pretty common. I’m from Finland.”
“So, you know who I am?”
“I’m from Germany, it’s pretty hard to not know you over there since ‘In the shadows’,” she explains. “And it doesn’t really help to stay incognito when you’re walking around with the lead singer. Even if you’re wearing a toga.”
I sigh. “Yeah, that stupid toga.”
“We don’t have anything else clean to wear cause our suitcases have taken the wrong plane. What’s your excuse for not going back and change clothes?”
I just point at Lauri who’s pulling of his best flirting techniques, successfully as it seems. “One of his stupid ideas.”
Lauri pulls the blond one towards the dance floor.
“You wanna dance, too?” I ask Jinx.
“No, not really.”
“Good, me neither. How about a drink at the bar?”
We sit down and order something to drink.
“So, you’re from Germany?” Stupid question, Aki, she just told you!
“Guess, you’re on holidays here then?” Oh yeah, that question was much better… moron! But I’m just not getting into the right flirting mood today…
“And is there someone in Germany waiting for you to come back home soon?” Not the most subtle way to ask if she has a boyfriend but it will do.
She smiles and nods.
And I’m not disappointed at all. I’m actually pretty glad that I don’t have to make up a stupid excuse later on when Lauri will ask why I haven’t tried to hook up with her.
“I’ve seen you at the beach today. What were you writing?”
Jinx blushes slightly. “Ehrm… just some story.”
“You write? That’s cool. Is there a chance I can read something from you somewhere one day?”
She blushes more, takes a sip from her beer and mutters something that kinda sounds like “I really don’t hope so.”
“Oh, nothing. Never mind.” She takes another sip from her beer.
We spend the rest of the night at the bar talking. Actually we drink more than we talk but that’s alright. I can’t really concentrate on a conversation anyway, seeing Lauri and that girl together. From time to time they leave the dance floor to join us for a quick drink, then they return to dance on.
Now that he’s holding her in his arms, dancing to a slow song, the only thing I can think of is how much I wish I was her…
“Do you want her or do you wanna be her?” Jinx suddenly asks from the side.
I stare at her, I can’t believe what she just said! Alright, it’s late and I’m pretty drunk but actually I thought I haven’t acted that obviously!
"Stop looking at me like that!"
”Ehrm… I… what did you just say?”
Jinx laughs. “I’m drunk but I’m not stupid! You’ve been watching them the whole night. And judging from your shocked face, I guess it’s the second one.”
I wanna tell her that she’s right, that I fancy Lauri, I wanna tell her the truth, finally telling it to someone, not having to be forced to deal with it all on my own.
But I don’t know her. Don’t know if I can trust her. So all I do is laugh.
“Yeah, sure! Oh, come on, you must be kidding. Of course I’m watching your friend, not Lauri!”
Jinx smiles but she doesn’t seem to be too convinced.
“Well then, sorry, dude! I’m afraid my friend has already made her choice for tonight and you’re not included. But good luck with finding someone else.” She grins and slaps my shoulder.
The music changes, they are playing Mariah Carey’s “Without you”.
Jinx gets up. “Uhrgh, Mariah. That’s it, I can’t stay or otherwise I’m gonna puke. Time for me to go to bed. Was nice talking to you.”
“Was nice talking to you, too. See you around.”
She smiles and waves, then she leaves the room. Maybe I should go to bed, too. There’s hardly anyone left anyway and just sitting here and watching Lauri with that girl doesn’t really help to make me feel good.
If I could only tell him. Tell him that it’s more than friendship that I’m feeling for him. Tell him that I’m longing for him to hold me, to kiss me, to touch me…
Suddenly Lauri dances towards me, singing along with the song. The girl seems to have disappeared. He lets himself fall on his knees in front of me and sings from the top of his lungs, his arms reaching up for me. “Can’t live, can’t live without youuuuuuuu!”
Oh man, if you just knew how much I wish you really meant this…
I laugh ashamed and pull him back up. “Come on, dude, at least try to pretend that you’re not a complete freak!”
Lauri grins and wraps his arm around my shoulder. “But don’t you know that I really can’t live without you?”
He looks at me and for a second it feels like he’s really meaning it.
“Lauri… you’re drunk.”
He smiles happily. “Yes, I am. And I’m pretty confident that the second part of my plan will work out just fine, too.”
“Where’s the girl?”
“Bathroom. Oh, she’s coming back. So if you would please excuse us? I’ll see you tomorrow!”
He turns away to walk towards her but then he turns back. “Hey, and seriously, living without you would suck. You’re my best friend!”
He walks away, laying his arm around her waist. She giggles and gives him a kiss on the cheek. Then they leave the room.
Lauri tends to say emotional stuff when he’s drunk but I know he was serious about what he has just said. We are the best friends and I know he loves me, too. But I also know he’s not loving me the way I wish he would.
Seeing him leave with the girl hurts. But somehow I’ve just realized that I need to get over my feelings. I’m his best friend. Neither less nor more.